The Great Sickness of 2010: Day 18

Sickness blows.

I haven't felt well since Jan. 18. I remember it distinctly, because it was the day I put in a really good morning spin just shy a few hours before my flight to Las Vegas for the International Builders' Show. I felt great -- so great I wouldn't feel guilty about skipping a few workouts because of my travels.

That week was rainy and cold, and the days were long -- 18 hours or so. My colleagues and I were worn down. I came back on Friday not feeling like myself, then got hit with the Flu Truck the following Tuesday. I stayed sick for a full week, felt decent enough to go to work and move around for five days (nothing taxing! Just going through motions), and then KAPOWIE! "Fuck you, Sara" the flu virus (or whatever the hell it is) said to me. "We're not done yet."

And here I am, at home, again, waiting for it to do its thing to my chest, ears, nose and throat. I had a major deadline that I had to work through for a few days at the beginning of the week, but as soon as we were done yesterday I made a public declaration: I have been given sick days, and I'm going to use them. I'm still in bed.

It's getting a little tiring. I'm watching my muscles soften up, and it kills me; I had intensified my workouts and changed 'em up so that I was seeing a real difference in my body and the way my muscles toned. I bought two new swimsuits in Vegas! They dance in the back of my head now, as I picture mushiness and flab spilling over my new lavendar bikini.

Of course, I won't lose everything, and as Brian told me, I'm healthy enough (hah! really?!) of a person that my strength and muscles will come back easily. I felt so crappy when I had the flu, I didn't care about missing the gym. But now I'm in that feels-crappy-but-is-still-mentally-there state, where I can recall my old life, the real me. Not sick Sara. My coworkers look at me with pity and concern, and Brian checks in on me constantly and makes sure I have whatever I need to feel better. I appreciate it all. But more than two weeks of feeling like an invalid is getting annoying.

I'm so ready to get on with life. Hopefully, that's happening: I can breathe through both nostrils today, enough to be able to use a homemade Netie Pot. It's the little things, right?