I believe that everyone should have a right to go to the bathroom privately and comfortably. I even feel for dogs, who are forced to go to the bathroom not just in public, but in front of their owner. Have you ever seen a dog look up happily at its owner -- watching with an eagle eye! -- while it squats? No, you haven't, because that dog is humiliated.

I bring this up because we found out this week that my dad's bladder cancer might be making a comeback. It was diagnosed a couple years ago, when he began frequent bacterial treatments that caused him a lot of pain. The treatments flushed really strong bacteria through his bladder, which makes peeing painful and even dangerous if he's not careful; he has to disinfect the toilet after he goes.

Going to the bathroom essentially had to take over his life. But then they started weaning him off and had switched him to a 6-month schedule. What they were doing was basically maintaining it, keeping it at bay. I could tell he wasn't running to the bathroom as often. I'm not sure if he was in pain.

Unfortunately, in his words, "the plumbing didn't start to work" right again, and in those 6 months, several growths developed. Now we're waiting to hear back if the tumors are malignant or cancerous.

I think at some point I read that bladder cancers are contained and that the worst-case scenario is a bag. That's certainly better than a lot of other alternatives, and believe me, we've been thankful this has been manageable and he's been able to maintain a pretty normal life. We don't ignore that.

But I would hate to have my dad go through all this again. I hate that going to the bathroom for him is difficult and could become a major part of his life. I feel the same way for a friend who's dealing with rectal cancer (hi, Beth).

They're both doing brilliantly and prove that you really can handle what life gives you, even when it comes to matters of the bathroom. But that doesn't mean that I like it and don't get angry they have to go through it.

Hopefully while I'm angry for the situation, some cosmic or karmic forces are making them both at ease so it's easier to focus on getting healthy.